How Bellydance Taught Me That It’s Never Too Late to Create the Life You Love!
I came here to dance! This is how I feel….about life. I have been dancing for most of mine. Ever since I was about five years old, I was taking dance lessons in ballet, tap, jazz, and modern dance. I was on my high school dance team, performing at high school football games as well as at places like Disneyland. I even got to go to dance competitions in Hawaii! After high school, I tried out for the San Diego Charger Girls. It was a great experience in facing my fears and just going for it but I didn’t even make the first cut. The competition was tough but unfortunately it was not something my fragile 19 year old ego could handle and I decided I wasn’t good enough. And even when I was thinner, I never felt that I had the “right body for dancing”! I was too curvy, my legs were too thick, and I was just never “skinny enough'“ (by the way, I wish I could go back and smack some sense into my young adult self….but don’t we all sometimes?!). Anyway, I decided to give college a try and throw myself into the party lifestyle that went with it. With that came the weight gain…I started drinking a lot and eating a lot of junk food. But through it all I was still dancing….only this time it was mostly at raves and night clubs. I was always happiest dancing!
Dazed and Confused 1993
As I grew older, I started working as a massage therapist, had kids, and got really into domestic life. I wouldn’t change being a Mom for anything but I really started only to identify with myself as a wife and a Mother . My weight fluctuated as did my moods. I sort of lost myself and stopped doing the things that made me happy! It was not too long after my divorce, and becoming a single Mom that I decided to start taking Bellydance classes. I had previously been introduced to Bellydance, just before I became a Mom, through The Goddess Workout DVD’s. I had known a little about Bellydance before but watching and dancing along with The Goddess Workout was like being transported to another world! Here was this beautiful woman doing these mesmerizing movements and talking about chakras and about how “all women are goddesses” ! And you know what…I was starting to believe her!
Fast forward about 7 years, and I decided to use one of the few nights I got to take for myself as a single Mom, and join a 10 week Bellydance series. I was nervous when I first showed up into a room full of women who I was sure were all going to be more beautiful and better at dancing than I was. But soon enough, I was smitten! I’m a little embarrassed to admit that my initial thoughts on Bellydance were that it was either to learn to shake it like Shakira to get a body like hers, or to learn some sexy moves to show to one’s significant other. I wasn’t prepared for how Bellydancing would make FEEL…physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Dancing in a room full of other women became empowering instead of intimidating. Almost like we were dancing for ourselves and each other! Doing undulations, hip circles, shimmies, and snake arms not only felt amazing but I was actually starting to get a glimpse of that cosmic divine feminine energy! This was my first taste of the spiritual side of dance.
I have always been into the metaphysical aspects of life….meditation, new age spirituality, gods/goddesses, energy, crystals, chakras, etc. It had never really occurred to me to combine dance with all that. I went on to further my study in chakras and meditative dancing, training in and becoming a Chakradance facilitator. This was the same year that I turned 40 years old. Doing yoga, Chakradance, and Bellydance almost every single day and feeling great….I couldn’t believe I was technically entering middle age! All I knew was that I loved dancing and I still had a dream of living my life as a dancer. Of course those same limiting thoughts popped into my head…”You’re too old”, “you don’t have the right body for it”, “there are so many other better dancers than you”. But I pushed them aside and then one day as I was browsing the internet, I came across The Goddess Life website and the call to become a Certified Goddess Workout instructor. I couldn’t believe it…this was the same mesmerizing goddess that gave me my first real taste of Bellydance years before and now this just happened to “pop” into my life (ummm…more like my soul’s guidance)! Anyway, I signed up to do the training. Not only was I learning to empower other women through the beautiful art of Bellydance, but I was becoming immersed in the Goddess Life philosophy. It was a reminder that I am a goddess as all women are, and that women are stronger when supporting and uplifting one another instead of competing and tearing each other down. Also that Bellydance is about celebrating that divine feminine energy within each of us. Bellydance (and dance in general) is a universal language and you don’t have to be a certain age, body type, color, etc. to get the benefits from it. In fact, as a plus sized middle aged woman, Bellydance has taught me to enjoy my body and all the sensual aspects that life has to offer. It has taught me how to love myself and to go for the things I want in life.
A couple of years after becoming a Certified Goddess Workout instructor, I was invited to be a part of a Goddess Ritual and photo shoot for the Goddess Life Sisterhood, created by Dolphina, my teacher and the goddess who first inspired me all those years ago. Even though I had a 2-4 hour drive each way (hello L.A traffic), and I was nervous again to be in a room with a bunch of intimidatingly beautiful women, I knew that it would be an experience that I would love and grow from! And I was right!
That night was the birth of the Goddess Life Sisterhood and this online community of women has changed my life! We bellydance together, have goddess rituals together, join in online happy hours together, all while providing constant inspiration and encouragement for each other. And it is open to all women who are looking for that…a place where one can find true sisterhood! I am so grateful that this is the path my life has taken. Even in my mid-life (I call it my mid life awakening) I feel like I am becoming more and more the woman I am meant to be. I have no regrets in anything because it has all brought me here. I no longer feel like I’m too old or not good enough to create the life I love! And I can finally proudly state that I am a dancer….dancing my way through life!
If you would like more info on my dance classes and goddess workshops, follow my Facebook page Chakra Goddess Dance and Healing Arts or my website chakragoddessdance.com
If you would like to join a fabulous community of goddesses, follow this link:
https://www.glsisterhood.com/share/7FIEfGHp6UNQs4TI?utm_source=manual